This is NOT High School Anymore

...so yeah...I'm still venting about my upcoming reunion. As happy as I will be to see some folks, I can't wait for this to be over. It's become the bane of my existence...until Sunday, that is.

Anyways, one of my classmates calls me to ask about where to go for registration on Friday. Of course, I snidely reply...had you checked your email, you would have seen an entire agenda for the weekend. (Me thinking: Stop blowing my damn phone up when you have all the answers at hand.) What's even funnier is that this one of the people that RSVP'd, yet we STILL don't have their damn money! I mean, why are you even asking about what is going on b/c if I don't have your money by registration on Friday, you will be locked the fuck out! I don't play that!

Then he proceeds to want a rundown of who is going to be in attendance. I name a few people off the top of my head. He is like...yep...I'll be trying to hit that this weekend...in fact, it's my goal to get with those girls that I didn't get with in high school. Now, I'm thinking, is he fuckin serious? Grow the fuck up? If they didn't want your ass then...what in the SAM HELL makes you think that they want you now...when your ass is complaining to me about how $40 is too much! Ole cheap ass! And, did I mention that he is the same one who requested that I order him a XXXXL shirt? Old cheap and gargantuan Shrek looking ass...and you think someone wants to talk to your SWOW (that's swine and cow combined) ass? I THINK NOT!!

(breathe)

These folk have done tested my nerves. I just hope that I don't go off this weekend...and even so, I don't give a fuck.

A Measly Forty Dollars...

...the total amount that my committee and I decided to charge for our class reunion. Coming from a class of only 176 in a small town, we didn't find it necessary to charge an exorbitant rate. We found that if we found ways to decrease costs, that we would have more people that would attend.

Survey Says: BAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMM!!!

Apparently not. Yeah...we only have about 50 people who signed up, if that...and about 10-15 of them paid AFTER the deadline. And, then some people are asking me about the breakdown of the costs b/c they don't want to do certain things. I'm like...for real...$40...stop being so fuckin cheap. In fact, I talked to one of my old classmates and when I told him $40, you would have thought that I said $4000. He was like...damn! And, of course, I'm like...don't be a cheap bitch. Of course, he defaulted to the...$40 is not a lot to you b/c you a lawyer, but that's a lot. Of course, I'm like...nukka, I have been a working lawyer for all of 3 weeks, after two months of unemployment, $140,000 in loans, a $200 plane ticket, and $70 for car rental for the weekend...and you don't hear me complaining about $40. If you really want to attend and reconnect with people that you haven't seen in 10 years, you can pay the $40, ESPECIALLY since your triflin ass still lives in our hometown...not to mention that you stupid ass has known for AT LEAST 6 months...and known for the last fuckin 10 years that the reunion was going to happen THIS YEAR. I mean, if you saved a dollar a year, you are 25% paid!!

Of course, that was met with silence...and then he's like, yep, you still tell it like it is. LOL!!

Cookout Hopping

So, yesterday my friend and I went cookout hopping....that is, we went to three different cookouts in one day...you know...to socialize, catch up with friends...and most important, EAT!! So, at the first barbecue at one of boy's house...they were playing Beirut aka Beer Pong. They had the table set up outside. I, having the table set up before, but never seeing it played, sat there at watched and was completely disgusted. I mean, that has to be the most unsanitary game I have ever seen in my life. And, despite the fact that you "rinse" of the ping pong in water before you toss it in someone's cup, that shit still is unsanitary. I mean, you pick up the ball...and then toss it into someone's beer, who then proceeds to drink it. I mean, what if you scratch yourself AFTER taking the ball out of the water and then toss it in someone's drink. That would be nasty as hell. Anyways...that wasn't the only unsanitary thing going on. OK...so there was of course hambergers and chicken on the grill. And, any normal...regular...sane person would know that you are not supposed to use the same utensils. But, clearly...someone didn't get the memo! The dude on the grill was using the same tongs to pick up the hamburgers as he was the RAW CHICKEN. I mean, can we SCREAM SALMONELLA??!! Needless to say, I didn't eat at that cookout.

Next cookout was wayyy out in West Hell! For real, though, we made a wrong turn, and I'll be damned if we didn't end up in Silent Hill. We thought our life was over! Anyways, we finally found way to the cookout....mind you it's like 9:00 p.m. Family cookout...I knew nobody...it was the friend of my friend...and she had seen her friend in like a year. Of course, we get there and see all this food and they are like...go fix yourself a plate. I, of course, don't eat everyone's food...but their house seemed clean...and they all had their eyes on me, so I fixed a plate. I was actually happy, though, b/c by this time, I was hungry as hell. So, I fix a turkey burger, some mac and cheese, and green beans. I'm thinking...these are three things that you just can't mess up. Survey says.....BOMMMM!!! The turkey burger was good...but the mac and green beans were a hot mess!! I mean, like...how can mess up green beans? What made it so bad is that is looked like it was going to be so good...I mean, the beans had the smoked turkey in it and all. But, womp womp womp...no seasoning what so ever...it was like they just opened up the damn can and warmed them bitches up in the microwave...then put the smoked turkey on top as a decoration. And, let me not even start on the mac and cheese. Just plain disappointed.

Third cookout....the best one of the day! Great food...great company...great games...hand dancing...spades...couldn't ask for anything better...and of course, we stayed until like 2 a.m. LOL!