Happy Hour: The Tragedy

So...I had a rough night last night. But, it starts earlier in the day. I ate lunch at 12...got off at 3...came home and took a nap...arose at 6 to go to my favorite happy hour spot.

And, this is where the tragedy begins.

I go to my favorite bartender...who begins mixing my drink as soon as he sees me walk in the door. (TRAGEDY #1)

I have that drink...plus about 6 more (TRAGEDY #2)

I'm feeling real good....nothing out of the normal for me for a Thursday night.

But then...it hits me. The stomach cramps...and my head begins to spin...and I realize...oh wow, I drank all of that on an empty stomach...I'm drunk and about to vomit. Being the controlled drunk that I am, I take a seat on a stool near my friends...put my head down....and then quickly grab a cup so that I don't vomit all over the place. (TRAGEDY #3) Cup #1 - FULL!

At this point, my friends are in awe b/c I never create this sort of scene. They are actively attending to me...of course, while everyone is watching. (TRAGEDY #4).

At some point, one of my friends is taking a napkin and wiping my forehead. My drunk ass, thinking that this is hilarious, bursts out into laughter...enough so to throw myself off of the stool and onto the floor. (TRAGEDY #5)

Three or four more cups of liquid vomit later (TRAGEDY #s 6-10), I am ready to go. I stand up with head high and proceed out of the door. My friends are trying to figure out who is going to drive me home. As they are formulating the plan, I am steady walking to my car like I'm about to drive myself home. I get to my car...crank it up...and then notice my friends running across the street to stop me. (TRAGEDY #11) I oblige her and then she drives me home...and makes sure I get to bed.

This morning, I awaken to go to work. I hop out of bed, pull a suit out of the closet, and then my head and stomach simultaneously say, "Sit your black ass down!" (TRAGEDY #12) I run to the bathroom, vomit some more, call in to work, and go back to bed for the rest of the day.

At some point, I crawl out of bed...and try to head to the kitchen to get a carbonated beverage. Open the refrigerator and NOTHING!! No carbonation; not even a damn bottle of orange juice. (TRAGEDY #13).

Dark...dark...and special dark!

Needless to say, I stayed my black ass home this evening.

The Truth Serum

So, I'm at a holiday party on Friday evening. Wine and beer were a-flowing. A group of judges were talking. One judge says...jokingly in response to another..."yeah...you can be my date to the party next year." Other judge: I'm not into that brokeback nonsense.

LMAO! Needless to say, though I was planning on leaving, I stayed until they left to see if anything else colorfol would be said.

And Then it was Frigid...

So, yeah...I wake up this morning to go the gym before work. I'm one of those strange souls that is OK with waking up at 6:00 a.m. to go and work out before I go to the office. So, anyways, I walk outside...and it is freezing. I mean...like I almost start to turn around and go back in the house. But, I was already up...and out...and so I just ran to the gym. Yep...a little adrenalin builder before the actual adrenalin builder.

So...it was cold.

But, what about, I came home from work tonight...and walked in my house...only to find that it was not too much warmer than it was outside. I look at the thermostat and it says 65. And, now I'm like...who in the SAM HELL would turn a thermostat to 65 in DC in the winter. I mean, fuck being cheap...that's just downright triflin. So, of course, I turn it up...way up...and now I'm in my room so as to avoid a conflict with the triflin roommate, as I was a little touched a minute ago. He better be glad that he is not home.


On a lighter note...I read the funniest complaint that I have ever read in my life today. A homeless person, whose address was "The Bench outside of 13th and G NW" is suing DC. Among many other things, she is suing for breach of contract after she bought something "that was sold back to her reused." LMAO!! Sad, but funny!

A H.A.M.

Orenthal James Simpson is a HOT ASS MESS!! Period. Point blank.

http://www.cnn.com/2006/SHOWBIZ/TV/11/15/simpsoninterview.ap/index.html

Nothing more. Nothing less. Except for this...OJ is dumb ass...ole raggedy ass bitch ass needs to get back to his roots ass H.A.M. sammich!

Carry on!

The Red Light District

So...on Saturday...a couple of my frat brothers and I visited Baltimore's "Red Light District." We went there after attending a ball. Yes...we were suited....which is issue #1. So, here were are 6 black guys...in suits...looking like we are coming from a MBA conference...in downtown Baltimore...in the Red Light District. Let's just say...we looked out of place. So, we turn the corner after getting directions (yeah...we were walking...in downtown Bodymore)...and there it is....the District. We are walking down the sidewalk...and at the very first door, this bouncer convinces us to come into his establishment...and since there was no cover, we checked it out. All I can say is...YUCK, BARF, ERLL, GAG! I'm talking about...just as SOON as we walked in to the door (us 6 black guys...clearly NOT from Baltimore...and all dressed in suits) we were approached by Becky the stripper. Now...Becky wasn't your Player's Club-type, Magic City/Strokers stripper...she was...err...GROSS! She had more gut than booty...and just looked plain dirty! But, she was happy as hell...as she thought she was about to make a killing. (insert long 3 minute BORAT pause) NOT!! She was trying to get my attention...and it clearly was NOT working. She then proceeded to tell me that she could tell that I was married and scared to be in such an establishment. I then proceeded to give her the "Bitch, back up" stare...and it STILL didn't work. Then, she started telling me her life story...and why she was working there...and why she needed the money. Mind you...all this time, I'm still giving her the "Bitch, back up" stare. She wasn't taking the hint. Then she proceeded to explain that she needed the money to take care of her son...who she had that particular weekend...because she was just given weekend visitation rights. LOL! Yep, you read that right. This heffa had her son for the weekend...but was in the club trying to make a dollar! First of all, why are you JUST getting visitation rights...and why only on the weekend? Isn't that your child? What did you do? Are you a crackhead? She finally got the hint that I wasn't going to bite...as I started to finally round up the troops...she made sure she pressed her ass against me....but clearly...no rise...because you are an ugly ass, more gut than ass having, visitation on the weekend crackhead beyatch!

Needless to say...we left there...and ended up at the real deal strip club called Norma Jeans. Let's just say...though we were only there shortly...like 15 minutes and then it was closing time, I will be going back. :)

Ooops...I Did it Again!

Funny Story from last week:

So, what about I'm sitting here at work...writing, or should I say, attempting to write this draft of an opinion (my writing skills don't seem to be gelling today)...

Anyways, the Judge comes into my office. As usual, he stands by my desk/ and asks me questions about cases. He then smiles and makes the following remark: "You and your choice of music." And, he's smiling, but his smile is a look of wonder. (i.e. the same look that he gave me when I was listening to Dianna Krall or Spyro Gyra or Maroon 5, as if I'm not supposed to listen to different types of music)

Now, I'm thinking...what is so different about my music today? I mean, I'm listening to D'Angelo's Brown Sugar CD (a classic, I might add). What's so different about that? Then, I realize that it is on Track 5...

And Track 5 is aptly titled...S**t, Damn, MF. LOL!

And, did I mention that it was loud? LMAO! Ooops! Needless to say, as he stood there and talked to me, I slowly and slyly turned the volume down a couple notches. LOL!

MTV is the Devil

OK...so yeah...I watch MTV from time to time. But, I'm going to try to curb that...because...MTV IS THE DEVIL.

Where is this coming from? Well, I find it absolutely hypocritical and discriminatory that MTV has put Justin Timberlake on a platform; and stepped on Janet's back. If I'm not mistaken, they BOTH contribute to Boobgate. But, it seems that MTV quickly forgave Justin and still hate Janet. Has anyone noticed that Janet's videos are no longer played on MTV? Yeah...MTV's first IDOL gets no airplay. And her record sales are an indication of how powerful MTV is. Justin debuted at #1 selling way over 600000 copies. Janet debuted at #2, selling just under 300000 copies. Justin went platinum in 2 weeks. Janet sales dropped over 70% the second week. As we live in the age of music video, your record sales don't depend solely on radio play. Television exposure is also a large part of the equation...and MTV is a large part of that equation. Thus, Janet gets no love.

I haven't even heard Janet's entire album yet. Maybe it is that her album isn't good. I find that hard to believe. Or maybe Justin's album is just that much better. (it is in extra heavy rotation on my end). But, I think the sales correlate to the fact that MTV has given him the spotlight and shunned her...despite the fact that HE was the one that disrobed her nipple. No justice for Janet.

Comments Galore

Yep...it is has been quite a while since I have blogged...and I have a bunch of random shit to say...

Where do I start?

1. My Class Reunion
Well, despite my rants and raves prior to the reunion, it actually turned out well. It was not as well attended as we had thought, but a good time was still had. And, it was really good to see MOST of the people that I graduated with ten years ago. But, others...yeah...they could have stayed their asses home. I mean, one in particular, just lies and lies and lies. But, I won't even go there. Well, actually, I will. Why do people have to put on fronts? I mean, if you work at a furniture store, be a proud furniture store worker...b/c guess what, you have a job....you are paying your bills...and you are doing alright. And, I, for one, could care less what it is that you do...as long as you are happy. You ain't got to lie, Craig...you ain't got to lie.

2. Ineptitude
Why are certain people in a certain division of a certain courthouse...so INEPT? I mean, how are you going to tell me one thing...and then tell the polar opposite to the next person that asked you the same exact question. Just triflin...and INEPT!!

3. Desperate Housewives
Am I the only one that was taken for a loop when Chow Mei ended up having a black baby? LOL! When Gabby and Carlos saw that baby, they were like...hell no...there will not be a Tyrone Jerome Solis here! lol Someone (BG) said that baby was Dominican (LMAO)...but I think not. THAT was a brother!

4. The Wire
Is it me...or is The Wire one of the best shows on TV? It's sad b/c it is a very realistic depiction of West Baltimore...but it is a great show. And, Omar is my mofo! And speaking of The Wire, why is Marlo's forehead so long? I mean, damn..it he has a football field on his forehead. He needs to do like Memphis Bleek and Neyo and just wear hats all the time.

5. White Water Rafting
The rapids were blah...class 1, 2, and maybe one 3. But, what was the craziest thing about my Saturday trip was when the Jack and Jill man came up and stole our chicken...and then he acted like he didn't know that it was our chicken when he KNEW that his wife had ordered pizza for them.

6. Short hair is not the business for all women. Please and thanks.

7. As AL said last night, why hasn't anyone picked at Deelishus (Flavor of Love) for those nasty ass keloids she has on her back? And, then that bitch has the nerve to wear off the shoulder dresses? LOL!

8. Why am excited about going home the third weekend of October?

9. My next door neighbor's cat has one more time to be over in our backyard b/c next time, I will be taking him up to the CarryOut for them to make some general tso chicken out of him.

10. The weather here in DC has been beautiful. I have been enjoying my walks to and from work.
OK...that's it...my mind has too much randomness going on.

This is NOT High School Anymore

...so yeah...I'm still venting about my upcoming reunion. As happy as I will be to see some folks, I can't wait for this to be over. It's become the bane of my existence...until Sunday, that is.

Anyways, one of my classmates calls me to ask about where to go for registration on Friday. Of course, I snidely reply...had you checked your email, you would have seen an entire agenda for the weekend. (Me thinking: Stop blowing my damn phone up when you have all the answers at hand.) What's even funnier is that this one of the people that RSVP'd, yet we STILL don't have their damn money! I mean, why are you even asking about what is going on b/c if I don't have your money by registration on Friday, you will be locked the fuck out! I don't play that!

Then he proceeds to want a rundown of who is going to be in attendance. I name a few people off the top of my head. He is like...yep...I'll be trying to hit that this weekend...in fact, it's my goal to get with those girls that I didn't get with in high school. Now, I'm thinking, is he fuckin serious? Grow the fuck up? If they didn't want your ass then...what in the SAM HELL makes you think that they want you now...when your ass is complaining to me about how $40 is too much! Ole cheap ass! And, did I mention that he is the same one who requested that I order him a XXXXL shirt? Old cheap and gargantuan Shrek looking ass...and you think someone wants to talk to your SWOW (that's swine and cow combined) ass? I THINK NOT!!

(breathe)

These folk have done tested my nerves. I just hope that I don't go off this weekend...and even so, I don't give a fuck.

A Measly Forty Dollars...

...the total amount that my committee and I decided to charge for our class reunion. Coming from a class of only 176 in a small town, we didn't find it necessary to charge an exorbitant rate. We found that if we found ways to decrease costs, that we would have more people that would attend.

Survey Says: BAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMM!!!

Apparently not. Yeah...we only have about 50 people who signed up, if that...and about 10-15 of them paid AFTER the deadline. And, then some people are asking me about the breakdown of the costs b/c they don't want to do certain things. I'm like...for real...$40...stop being so fuckin cheap. In fact, I talked to one of my old classmates and when I told him $40, you would have thought that I said $4000. He was like...damn! And, of course, I'm like...don't be a cheap bitch. Of course, he defaulted to the...$40 is not a lot to you b/c you a lawyer, but that's a lot. Of course, I'm like...nukka, I have been a working lawyer for all of 3 weeks, after two months of unemployment, $140,000 in loans, a $200 plane ticket, and $70 for car rental for the weekend...and you don't hear me complaining about $40. If you really want to attend and reconnect with people that you haven't seen in 10 years, you can pay the $40, ESPECIALLY since your triflin ass still lives in our hometown...not to mention that you stupid ass has known for AT LEAST 6 months...and known for the last fuckin 10 years that the reunion was going to happen THIS YEAR. I mean, if you saved a dollar a year, you are 25% paid!!

Of course, that was met with silence...and then he's like, yep, you still tell it like it is. LOL!!

Cookout Hopping

So, yesterday my friend and I went cookout hopping....that is, we went to three different cookouts in one day...you know...to socialize, catch up with friends...and most important, EAT!! So, at the first barbecue at one of boy's house...they were playing Beirut aka Beer Pong. They had the table set up outside. I, having the table set up before, but never seeing it played, sat there at watched and was completely disgusted. I mean, that has to be the most unsanitary game I have ever seen in my life. And, despite the fact that you "rinse" of the ping pong in water before you toss it in someone's cup, that shit still is unsanitary. I mean, you pick up the ball...and then toss it into someone's beer, who then proceeds to drink it. I mean, what if you scratch yourself AFTER taking the ball out of the water and then toss it in someone's drink. That would be nasty as hell. Anyways...that wasn't the only unsanitary thing going on. OK...so there was of course hambergers and chicken on the grill. And, any normal...regular...sane person would know that you are not supposed to use the same utensils. But, clearly...someone didn't get the memo! The dude on the grill was using the same tongs to pick up the hamburgers as he was the RAW CHICKEN. I mean, can we SCREAM SALMONELLA??!! Needless to say, I didn't eat at that cookout.

Next cookout was wayyy out in West Hell! For real, though, we made a wrong turn, and I'll be damned if we didn't end up in Silent Hill. We thought our life was over! Anyways, we finally found way to the cookout....mind you it's like 9:00 p.m. Family cookout...I knew nobody...it was the friend of my friend...and she had seen her friend in like a year. Of course, we get there and see all this food and they are like...go fix yourself a plate. I, of course, don't eat everyone's food...but their house seemed clean...and they all had their eyes on me, so I fixed a plate. I was actually happy, though, b/c by this time, I was hungry as hell. So, I fix a turkey burger, some mac and cheese, and green beans. I'm thinking...these are three things that you just can't mess up. Survey says.....BOMMMM!!! The turkey burger was good...but the mac and green beans were a hot mess!! I mean, like...how can mess up green beans? What made it so bad is that is looked like it was going to be so good...I mean, the beans had the smoked turkey in it and all. But, womp womp womp...no seasoning what so ever...it was like they just opened up the damn can and warmed them bitches up in the microwave...then put the smoked turkey on top as a decoration. And, let me not even start on the mac and cheese. Just plain disappointed.

Third cookout....the best one of the day! Great food...great company...great games...hand dancing...spades...couldn't ask for anything better...and of course, we stayed until like 2 a.m. LOL!

Working is Overrated

So...today was the first day in the rest of my life. Yep, I again entered into the work force...and I must say it was boring as hell. The first day consisted of hours of HR stuff...stuff which I could have done in a matter of an hour. But, I had to go through the motions of sitting there and acting like I had no idea what they were talking about, despite my prior three years in HR and 2 years interning for the federal government. Oh well...I guess it comes along with the territory of new employment. I, of all people, should know that.

There were some highlights of the day:

1. When I finally was let go by HR, I went to my office to discover that they had already changed out all the name plates and put my name on the door outside and on my desk. That was cool.
2. I actually went through a mini-swearing in procedure.

The most memorable part of the day, however, was when walking to lunch with the 2 other people that started today. As we were about to cross the street, one of the girls somehow missed the curb and fell. And, it wasn't just your ordinary fall....it was like the worst fall in the world...in the middle of an extremely busy intersection. It was so bad that she had to sit on the ground for a second and recoup. Now...of course, I helped her up and made sure that she was OK...but from that point on, I walked in front of the 2 ladies b/c I didn't want them to see that I was laughing uncontrollably. That shit was the funniest thing that I have seen in a long time. I'm laughing about it as I sit here and type. Good thing that she was alright.

...and another thing...so, I get off work today...totally intended to come straight home and come to the gym. Yea...so that didn't happen. I came home and took a 2 hour nap...the best nap I've had in a long time...a nap so good that I plan on doing the same thing tomorrow...which means going to the gym BEFORE work. We'll see how this works.

Customer Service

I truly don't believe that some people understand the importance of quality customer service. It is a matter of what most of us learned from our parents even before we started school...and that is to do unto others as you would have them do unto you. And, when running a business, it is imperative that you treat people with respect and fairness to ensure that they will support your business in the long run.

Where is this coming from?

Last night, one of my "co-workers" acted a damn fool at the door of a party, which is NOT good customer service. And, though I was on the verge of calling her the bitch that she was, I refrained to not cause a scene...but best believe that when the crowd died down, I went over and put her ugly ass in check. Needless to say, she won't be working the door anymore.

Stepping into the Darkness

Well...I have finally done it. I have finally stepped into that which is dark...that which is MySpace. And, I have already found myself wasting precious time looking at other people's pages. The funny thing is that I am already addicted to Facebook, which I must say that I like 10 times better than MySpace. Yes, MySpace has the music and videos...but it is much harder to navigate...and I'on know about the fact that I am on the same network with my 17 year old nephew and his friends. The real reason that I joined is actually legit however...this year marks my 10 year reunion and as the president of my senior class, I have organized the reunion. One of the classmates on my committee informed me that several of our "lost" classmates had pages on MySpace...and thus, in order to promote the reunion, I joined and found those classmates. (Yes, I'm also on classmates.com, reunion.com, alumniclass.com...all of them in order to promote this reunion). So, he was right...and now the word for our late September reunion is spreading more rapidly...which is exactly what I wanted. Outside of the reunion, however, I still have spent too much time on this beast called MySpace...and can already see how it is addictive.

Caribana 2006

...all I have to say is WOW! I had a BLAST in Toronto for Caribana. And, as that was my first time in Toronto, I have to give it one big fat THUMBS UP! It's like a mini-NY, except it is CLEAN and the people are NICE. And, I don't know if it was just b/c of Caribana, but if the women of Toronto are as beautiful as all the ones that we saw, I may just have to think about moving. (OK...not really b/c despite the fact that I like cold weather and the snow, I don't do blizzards)

Anyways, here are some memories....not exactly a top ten b/c it is early and I am old and can't remember everything...but definitely some good memories...

1. The look on GFW's face when he pulled a 9 while we were playing Kings.
2. The trombone and the tuba. LMAO!!
3. PC and the parade. Let's just say that someone was extremely happy and in their element.
4. The mosh pit or whatever at the White Party. In particular, EE...what happened to you man...why is your white not white anymore? LOL!
5. The Karaoke Bus.
6. GFW: That was more like 2 strikes. You have one more time and then it is on.
7. The mall parking lot at Christmas time.
8. Rappin ForTay at the club...talking to me about the Silver Fox. Um...yeah....we are in Toronto, NOT in Duval!
9. You will have a guilty conscience about the headband. lol
10. Where's WW? I think we lost him.
11. Why is the only time that we saw a near fight in the club when we went to the Def Jam (American) party?
12. It's CARNIVAL!! ... this is the song that we heard at least 10 times each day that we were in Toronto.
13. Clearly someone did not get the memo that wearing those 50Cent thick strap tanks is a no-no...and especially to the club with dress pants. NOT a good look!
14. It's all about the points.
15. That nasty ass rice outside of the club...um...this takes like seasoned cardboard.
16. GFW in club sizing up any and everybody he walked passed. LOL...ni**a what?
17. REE to the Hooters waitress: Could we have a do ever?
18. Me: Um...who just grabbed my booty? GFW: That girl and her friend right there that just ran down the street.
19. You mean to tell me that all you have is doughnuts? I mean, how are you going to be advertising 24 hours and you don't have any meat?
20. GFW: (excited) That's Dwight Gooden. Me: You mean, Drew. LOL!

Anyways...another wonderful time with my boys...the ones that keep me grounded. As soon as the points are built back up, off to London. LOL!

The Heat

...it is hotter than a witch's nipple outside!! I mean...damn...I'm supposed to be living up North and it is hotter here than it is in my native Florida. And, here I am telling people that I could not move back to Florida b/c of the heat...well, if that's true, then I need to move to Canada b/c Florida heat and humidity has taken over the District.

Speaking of heat...so today I go to court to watch some cases. And, one dude was up on a show cause for possible violation of probation. So, the probation officer is telling the judge how the guy has been coming in and testing negative...except for one week, he refused to be tested. And, the judge is like...um....why couldn't you be tested that week? I mean, if you have been testing negative all this time, why all of a sudden are you refusing to be tested? Sounds to me like your piss is going to be cloudy (ok...he didn't say it like that...but that is what he clearly was thinking). So, then the guy goes...it wasn't my fault, your honor. I couldn't go...I just couldn't use it that week. And, of course, the judge is like...b/c you would test positive, right. And, then the guy goes...no, your honor, it's because I got burned...and I couldn't pee. Now...I'm thinking...ooooohh.....he got burnt....I wonder if the judge knows what "burned" means. Clearly, he didn't b/c he goes...well how did you get burned? At this point, it is taking everything that I have NOT to burst into laughter. Then the guy goes...Sex, your honor. The look on the judges face at this point is CLASSIC...you could see it set in on him. Then, he's like...SIDEBAR!! LMAO!! Now THAT was hilarious!!

Praise the Lord and Shame the Devil!!

Hallelujah...the bar is over!

This process has been the most taxing and strenuous process in my life. I mean, I spent at least 8 hours a day studying for the last 2 months (well, month and a half). NOT a good look! But, it's over now...and now I'm back to normal...so I MUST make comments.

OK...yeah...I was extremely unimpressed with the event coordinators at the Tampa Convention Center. I mean, they have help to organize the bar for numerous years and you would have thought that this was the very first year. I am thankful that the Lord have already given me a spirit of peace because if I was at all stressed going into the exam, I would have lost it standing outside with the rest of the 2000-3000 people waiting to take the exam...while wondering if I was going to get it in time. My friend and I got to the test site at 7:30 for the 9:00 exam and didn't make it to our seats until at least 8:40. RIDICULOUS!! They had only one cashier for taking money in the room that we had to leave all of our stuff in...yeah...one person for over 2000 people. Then, for lunch...yeah...why is it that there are like NO eating places directly around the TCC. I mean, it's a Convention Center for God's sake. Why no vendors? So, yeah...they did have a courtesy cart with sandwiches...and a restaurant called Jackson's across the water...but, that was about it. However, other than the logistics of event planning, everything else went smoothly.

Now that I think about, it is absolutely amazing to me that the state with the 4 largest population in America has all of its bar applicants take the exam all in ONE room. Yep, you read that right...everyone taking the Florida bar was in ONE room. It was "WOW"! Not overwhelming...but WOW!! lol

Anyways, I'm just thankful its over. Now, I can relax until the career begins.

Countdown

OK...the countdown is officially on and poppin...in exactly a week, I will be hoping on a plane to Tampa to take the bar. It's been a long summer...extremely long...but I'm ready to get this ish over.

(speaking like the crazy ass PMRB lady) I got this baby!!

I Am...

...irritated, agitated, and aggravated...sick and tired of being sick of tired...spirit on a very low low...physically and mentally exhausted.

Yep...that's me in a nutshell.

I Have to Go to Heaven...

...b/c I am currently living in HELL! Studying for the bar is worse than law school itself. I mean, today, I started surfing the web for jobs on Monster.com b/c I am soooo over it! Hey...Polo Ralph Lauren is hiring management. Why not do that...and secure myself the discount that I need instead of slaving away for 10-11 hours a day learning damn Property and Contracts? Again...I'm soooo over it!

Prepping for the Big One

OK...so you graduate...and you are proud of your accomplishment...only to, a day later, re-realize that you have to start studying for the bar! And, as my bar preparation has began, I've already realized that studying for the bar SUCKS! There is no way in hell that there are enough hours in the day to retain all of this information (12 huge volumes worth) and then by able to apply all of it in a 2 day 8-hour time period. Good thing that this isn't law school where getting the A or the highest grade has some weight...with the bar, even if you pass by a point, you pass and get certified. That is all it takes. So, that is what I have to keep in mind as I embark on the 8 week long journey.

(sigh)

I Love My Chick

For JNM, this is NOT about the boocakes. LOL!

Anyways, yeah...so I just saw this Busta Rhymes video for the first time, and it has absolutely solidified my love for Gabrielle Union. I love everything about that woman...especially when she plays roles like the one in the video...or like the psycho lead in Deliver Us from Eva. Something about a female who has psycho potential is a turn on to me for some reason. LMAO! Maybe, I'm a glutton for pain/drama/living on the edge. Or maybe, on this first day of my bar review classes, I have lost my mind. LOL!

Emotional Rollercoaster

This weekend has been one of the most memorable and emotional weekends of my life. It was the culmination of over three years (four counting LSATS and applications) of my life. It was the end of one season and the beginning of another. And I find myself sitting here at the computer this early because of my inability to go to sleep. I can't sleep because when I close of my eyes I can see the faces of the people that have become my family for the last three years. I remember the first time that I met each and every one of them...I remember all of the struggles that we went through to get to that point yesterday when they called our names...each one as new attorneys at law. I see there faces and I am so happy and proud of them for persevering...for making it! At the same time, I shed tears...not because I am sad that law school is over...but because I realize that though we will always be friends, things will never be the same. I shed tears because some of those people that have become my brothers and my sisters are at this very moment getting on planes or in cars to drive away from the District to distant places. Never again will each of us a Top Shelf away (lol). And, saying goodbye...or so long...or see you later...is such a hard thing to do in situations where the people that parting are such a large part of your life. So, I shed tears both of joy and of sadness...but knowing that I am so blessed to have had and blessed to continuously have each and everyone of them in my life...whether near or far!

Bittersweet

Graduation is one of those times in your life when you see the fruits of your labor. It's an exciting time...a time of true personal achievement.

But, as the actual day gets closer, I'm beginning to get sad b/c some of the people that have shared this experience called law school with me will be leaving. What's funny is that, as I get older, the more emotional I get about stuff like this. When I graduated from high school, I was cool . . . no tears . . . no real emotions . . . it was more like . . . thank God I'm going to college. Graduation from undergrad . . . the same thing . . . leaving grad school to come to law school . . . same thing (well, actually, I was cool all the way up until the time that I was driving away . . . then it hit me that I was leaving.) LOL! But, now, the day hasn't even gotten here and I'm thinking about the fact that, on Monday, SC, BM, BE, JT, SS, NDM, JKR, LP, VDZ, LC, CS and others are leaving DC. That sort of blows my mind. Law school is sort of like being on line again . . . it's an experience that only those who go through it with you will understand. It's an experience that forces you to really get to know some people . . . and these people get to see you at your best and at your worst. So, the fact that they won't be around is a little jarring.

Full Recovery

My Protie made it through surgery without a hitch. Ok...well...maybe with one hitch...as they drove me car around to me this morning, I was so excited and pleased with the job that they did. But, something didn't look right. Then, I noticed that they ordered the wrong wheel cover. They ordered the one that originally came with my car...but I had gotten newer ones after someone STOLE one of my wheel covers this past summer (who in the HAYLE steals wheel covers?). So, until Monday, one of her shoes is missing...but other than that, she came out of surgery looking and feeling better than she did before she went in.

YAY!

A Living Nomad

OK...it dawned on me this past month that I have moved every year of my life for the past 10 years. That is crazy when you think about it. From undergrad to grad school to working to law school, I have decided with the change in each year that is would be appropriate for me to make a move. What's funny about that is that I absolutely hate moving b/c you realize how much stuff you actually accumulate with each new move. It's amazing. So, this year, I decided that this was going to be the year when my permanent address would not change. I currently share a beautiful rowhouse with 3 roommates and the situation has been great (other than the occassional uncleanliness). We each made a decision that we would stay in this house, which is owned by an older couple that moved away to do missionary work. So, Monday, our roommate (who is sort of like our house manager/correspondent with management...lol) let us know that the owners would be coming Tuesday morning to have the house appraised. I was like...appraised? As in they are thinking about selling? And, then on Tuesday morning, as I open the front door to leave the house, the owner is sitting outside on the front patio waiting on the appraiser. Say it ain't so. Then, house manager comes home and tells us that he talked to the owner who IS considering selling the house...and that our property manager (the couple hired a property manager to manage the house for them...and he happens to live right next door...and is this very rich guy that owns a large construction company) is considering purchasing the house, as he and his wife are having a second child and want a larger house.

Ain't that about a bitch? The one time that I am trying NOT to move...may be the one time that do I have to move. :(

Business Travelling

OK...so I was hype about going on my first overnight business trip of my internship after being employed here for 2 whole years!

Now...I'm over it!

First of all, I'm in HARRISBURG, PA! Womp, womp, womp!

Second, I'm with one of my co-workers that isn't wrapped to tight. Now, I let him drive b/c I knew I had stuff to do...and I knew that I had a hangover from last night and wanted to go to sleep. Do you know that it took us 15 minutes to get from our job to the Beltway...a trip that literally should take 5 minutes. And, it wasn't b/c there was traffic. It was b/c he was determined to use his portable GPS system...and when he made a wrong turn...instead of following it...he went all the way down Georgia to Walter Reed (mind you, we work in downtown Silver Spring) to take Alaska to 16th street...to go north back to Silver Spring...then took 16th all the way to Connecticut to get on the Beltway. I was like...where in the holy HELL is he going? And, what made it so bad is that he was complaining about other drivers...when he almost killed us b/c he almost missed the I-95 exit off of the Beltway. So, here we go zooming through 4 lanes of traffic to make the exit. Mind you...if he would have just been listening to his GPS system, he would have been in the correct lane. Dumb ass!! At this point, I decide it's time for me to go to sleep.

Then, I wake up..and we are in Harrisburg...and again, instead of just using the Mapquest directions that I pulled up, he was pressed to listen to his GPS system..and lo and behold, he doesn't listen again and misses a turn. Again, I say, DUMB ASS!!

We finally make it to the hotel...and he's like, what time do you want dinner? Is 7 to late? I don't care...cause now I'm like, I really don't feel like sitting at dinner and talking to these two. (another guy was with us that I just met today). But, we went...and then it was back to the hotel. Praise GOD that I have my own room b/c I KNOW that he would have been irking my damn nerve.

Let's just say that tomorrow will be a long day.

Note to Self: From now on, DO NOT not volunteer your ass to go on overnight trips with certain folks.

Thanks.

The Management.

Thank You JESUS!!

I have sooo much to be thankful for....and today, I am truly thankful for it all. In particular, I'm thankful that God has brought me through this part of my life called law school. This time of my life I have had to lean on him more than ever before. And, though I feel like I completely bombed my last ever law school exam last night...as my parents told me last night, HE did not bring me this far to leave me.

So, now I'm done...and it feels more weird than a wolf. I actually didn't have to set my alarm last night (that of course will be a short lived feeling once bar classes start). And, on May 21, though I'm done NOW, I'll officially be awarded with my my degree. Ain't that a blessing!

She's Alive

PRAISE WHITE JESUS!!

Protie is ALIVE and well...and is NOT totalled! (doing my holy ghost dance)

And, not only did they "save" her...they gave me a check to get her fixed...and said that I could go back to the original body shop OR I could choose any other body shop that I wanted (which to me meant...let me see if I can go get the same service and repairs done somewhere were the cost is more reasonable...and save a few of these bucks.) LOL!

...so now, it's on to find that deal! Thank God that I'll have time to do that after Monday evening!

ok...on a side note...

next week, I'm actually doing an over nighter with my internship. We have to go up to Harrisburg, PA to do an interview/investigation. Hmm...I haven't decided if I wanna go or not because 1) it's in Harrisburg, PA....and what in the HELL is in Harrisburg, PA; 2) I'm not to keen on being in the same car/train/whatever form of transportation we are taking with the main investigator for that amount of time; 3) OK..there is no three, it's just a good round number. Funny how I'm in my last two weeks of working at my internship...and in the 2 years that I have worked there, this is the FIRST time I've done an overnight.

on a super side note...

I heard JJ Fad on the radio today. The S is for super, and the U is for unique. The P is for perfection and you know that we are freaks. LOL! I wonder if their families make them perform that song at every family reunion? LOL!

Protie....NO!!!!!

OK...I admit...I sort of love my car. Not b/c it's a Bentley, Benz or BMW...but b/c it's MY car. It's the first car that I bought all by myself. I remember, in August of 1998, when I went to the lot to pick it out. I picked out one color...and was all set...and then as I was walking back into to sign the papers, I saw her. She still had the white tape/film on it and everything...and at that moment, she became mine. (OK...I'm sounding like someone who needs a friend...but I don't care. LOL!)

Anyways, as she was violated the other day, I finally got the word from the violator's insurance company that I could take Protie in to get repaired. So I do some research before I choose a place...and then set up an appointment. I'm actually getting hype at this point b/c she is going to be fixed soon. I roll up at the dealership (yep, I took her to the dealership body shop...can't just be going to anyone...and they were on the insurance companies preferred list) and prepare to part for a few days. I had actually been cool with the fact that she had been in an accident...that is all the way up until today when the body shop told me that my car may have to be totalled out. WHAT? Totalled out? What do you mean? I mean, she's still completely drivable...she just needs a small facelift. Then he was like, unfortunately, once the damage totals add up to more the 70% of what the car is worth, the insurance company usually totals it out. I'm like...so that means you are not going to fix her? He says, when we have damage like this, we have to have the actual insurance company estimator give it a look before we can proceed. Let's set up you an appointment for State Farm to look at it. At this point, I'm heated. Totalled to me means that you are going to give me a check for the retail value of my car and take my car....meaning I have to get a new car...meaning I have to take the time to go and search for a new car and potentially ending up with a car that I have to make payments on. I don't do payments. Been there...done that...finished in August 2003! Thanks. The Management. Plus, as I am about to graduate, I'm about to have to start making payments ANYWAY...that is, on these gargutuan amount of loans that I have to pay back. But, let me not even start down that road! And, I'm not trying to be having my entire check taken by these loans, and car payments, and insurances. Hell to the NAW!

So...all I can do now is wait until Friday and see what they say. All I know is...they better not say the wrong thing. I don't want to have to act ethnic!

Just Freeze!

"Don't change... Don't go... Don't leave... Just FREEZE! I know girl it's alot to ask! Tell me what other choice I have, When you love someone this bad... Just FREEZE! Don't change... Don't go... Don't leave... Just FREEZE! Girl I hope you understand, Promise I'll be back for you, When I become a better man..."

LL and Lyfe Jennings might have just hit the nail on the head with this one. This may just wrap my situation up all in one chorus. Sad, but true.

Finals

By now, you would think that I would be accustomed to finals, being that I only have 1 more left to take EVER!! However [comma], that is not the case as it bewilders me that I can spend 3 hours on an exam and still feel like I need 3 more to thoroughly complete it. It also amazes me how FAST 3 hours can pass because you start the exam one minute...and next thing you know they are yelling time.

At this point, as long as I pass, I'm cool. But, I would like to maintain at least a B average this semester. We'll see what happens.

My Baby Was Violated

So, last night I went to a potluck. It was my intention when I left to go to the library and study until it closed at 2. But, I was tired...probably b/c I did not have a chance to take my daily nap...so I decided to come home. And, on my home, IT happened. I'm driving southbound down 9th Street in the far left lane. And, right near the intersection of 9th and I (near Pearl), this little Dodge Neon attempt to make a left turn from the 2ND LANE (instead of the proper lane to make such a turn, which is the lane that I was in!) So, you know what happened...BAM!! He ran right into me!! My poor Protie (my car's name) was violated!!

Then, we get out of the car...to assess the damage. He is like...I'm OK...can we just exchange numbers? Um...hell to the naw. Let's pull over out of all this traffic and look around b/c I feel like my car is NOT OK. So, we hop into our cars...and decide to pull over to a side street. So, I'm thinking that he is going to pull over at the next street. That was not the case...in fact, I felt like he was trying to escape, as I got caught at the next light...and he kept on going. Luckily, I had written down his tag number as soon as I got back into my car. Finally, as the light is green, I speed up and start flashing him. Then, he pulls over on E street (yep that's now 4 complete blocks away) and stops the car. I get out to look at the damage...and realize that my poor Protie is hurting pretty bad. The entire right side of my car was damaged somewhat, especially the front. In fact, my passenger door would only open a bit. He gets out of the car and starts looking at the damage. Then, he's like...are you sure you weren't speeding? Are you fucking serious? Um...NO I was not! Furthermore, it wouldn't matter anyways b/c you made a left turn from an internal lane...not the left lane. Had you been in the left lane making that turn, we would not have had an accident...but since you decided to cut across a lane to make a turn without first looking to see if anyone was coming, you hit me! Thanks. The Management. Then, he's like...OK...you're right. I'm like...I know that.

So, of course, I get all of his information plus all of his mother's information as she is the one that's insured...while calling the police. Now it around 11:00 p.m. I find out that he is this little young kid...19...driving his sister's car...without a driver's license. (He has one but it's not on him.) Oh well...that's your fault. So, we're waiting on the cops, who said that they were on their way. That was a lie. At 11:30...still no cops...so I call them back. They are still on their way. At 11:45...still no cops. Another call. Another lie. 12:00 ...still no cops. FINALLY, AT 12:10, the police arrive...mind you, the accident occurred at 10 till 11. The cop apologizes for his tardiness but says they sent him to the wrong quadrant. LIES! Anyways, after talking to the both of us, and seeing that we were OK...and that our cars were drivalbe, he explains to us that DC is a "no fault" jurisdiction and that no report would be made...it was up to us to handle it through our insurance companies. So, you're telling me that I just wasted over an hour of my life waiting for you...and your BAMA ass is not going to fill out a report. HELL TO THE NAW!! You are going to give me something...even if it's just your badge number. Then, he decides, after finding out the other guy doesn't have his license that a report will be made. Damn skippy!!

So, by the time all that happens, it is now almost 1 a.m....two hours from when the incident occurred. So, much for the efficiency of MPD. We finally are allowed to go...I get home and run right up to get my camera and take pictures...and then go to bed.

So much for my night of rest!

The Nerve of Folks

OK...so I'm sitting in the Mock Trial Board room/office...trying to finish up my brief that is due tomorrow. I've been sitting in here alone for at least an hour. Then, I hear someone coming into the door. It's some Kirsten that I have never seen before in my life. She says, Hi...looking at me like I stole something. So, I return the look...and then introduce myself. She does the same. Then as she is sitting down across the table from me...this bitch has the audacity to ask me if I am on the Mock Trial Board. Are you fuckin kidding me? No...I was just sitting my ass in here before you got here w/out permission. In fact, I just walked through that damn locked door in order to get in here. Or even better, though I'm not on the board, I just happen to know the code to get me into the damn office. So, I had to give her THAT "you dumb bitch" look...and say....are YOU are the mock trial board? In my mind, I was also saying...bitch, why in the fuck would I be in here if I wasn't on the board. She answers yes...and of course, with attitude, I say...you must be a 1 or 2L...so young...I was on the board before you even had a chance to try out. And, then I smiled...and went back to what I was doing. I tried to give her enough attitude so that she would leave...but this Becky clearly didn't get the hint.

Bliss

Today was my last official day of classes EVER (that is, if you don't include bar review classes)!! All I can say is that I'm happier than a wolf!!

Frustration...

This week has been full of frustration.

First of all, graduation. Graduation is supposed to be a happy time...a time of reflection...a time of accomplishment. For me, at this moment in time, it is a time of frustration. First of all, how in the hell are you going to give me just SIX tickets for graduation. I just paid you $120000 for the longest 3 years of my life, and you are telling me that only SIX of my peeps can come to graduation. I THINK NOT! I have 20 people coming ... and if they think that all of people are not getting in...then there will be consequences and repercussions. Let's just pray that I don't get arrested on graduation day cause it will look ugly if I have to report to the bar committee that I got arrested on my graduation day. Application DENIED!

In addition to the tickets, graduation means that bar courses are right around the corner...which means thousands of dollars will be dropped in a matter of days. It's bad enough that I'm about to experience the most dreadful summer of my life...but it's even worse that it's going to make me broke as hell. I'm going to have to sell my body to sustain myself. Such a shame...lol.

Itinerary...with all of my family and friends coming...developing an itinerary to suit all is going to be problematic. First of all, my family already says that I'm bourgie...lol...but I can't help it. If I want Old Ebbitt Grill or Capitol Grille for my graduation, shouldn't I be able to get it? But, I shall compromise and either go to Georgia Browns or Buca di Beppo.

My Class Reunion. This is starting to become the bane of my existence. Maybe I should have thought about this 10 years ago when I decided to be senior class president. Things are moving that way I had hoped...and I hope it all falls into place BEFORE bar classes begin...b/c when that starts...it's a wrap!

On top of all of that, my roommates are starting to irk my last nerves. I mean, all they did was speak to me when I walk in the door...but for some reason, it's been irking me. Praise GOD that they will be gone this weekend so I can thoroughly clean my house...and then sit here in the peace and quiet. I have strongly considered moving...but I neither the time nor the energy to do that...plus, I would like there to be at least one year of my life when I don't move (as I have moved every year for the past 10 years.)

With all that said though, as Deacon Colden used to say every Sunday, Praise God for as well as it is, cause it could be worse.

Cynthia McKinney...

was wrong for both her actions...and her hair.

Thanks.

The Management.

Kill the Radio

OK...generally, I find that I listen to the radio...especially when I go back home to Florida or to Atlanta so that I can hear what the new hot shit is...

HOWEVER, COMMA...

If I hear that damn Keyshia Cole "Love" song one mo 'gin, I think I just may jump out of my office window. They play that song like every 30 minutes on the radio. I mean, don't get me wrong, I think that Keyshia Cole's album was the most slept on R&B album of 2005. I played it to death...HOWEVER, COMMA...something about hearing Love over and over and over and over and over again...within a matter of a few hours, doesn't sit too well with me...and it's driving me fuckin crazy!

I mean, there are like 13 other cuts on the album...and there are about 3 billion other songs out there to play on the radio...so why must you play THAT one song 17 hundred times. I'm sick of it...and I just may be sick of radio. This would be one of the reasons that I am highly considering jumping on the bandwagon (i.e. conforming) and purchasing an IPOD.

A Championship Weekend

Yep...not only did my beloved Gators take home the National Championship on Monday night after devouring George Mason on Saturday and UCLA last night, but also my DC Elite Squad took first place at the Stone Mountain Lithonia DST Alumnae Step Show!

(singing like Jojo and K-Ci) Life life...life life....life life....life life.

We did a great show...but I must admit...I was about to die up on stage...the adrenalin of the crowd made us go into to hyper step mode...and we were doing the steps wayyyy faster than normal. By the time I got backstage, I could barely breathe! But, it was definitely worth it. Plus, I got to see my boocakes...and I hadn't seen her in quite some time.

OoooooWeeee!!

WOW! I had a blast this weekend...and I'm more tired den a wolf!!

I don't even know where to start. I met so many cool ass people. And, despite the fact that I gave up the race in 97 (lol), it felt so good to be in the same place as soo many ambitious and educated young people that looked like me.

There are sooo many memorable moments:

1. Room 959...Wednesday, Thursday, Friday AND Saturday night. Way to hold it down Univ of Alabama!
2. It's Party Time!! Double DARKNESS!!
3. JB: Some of these females put on their 30 minutes shoes for a 4 hour boat ride. NOT a good idea!
4. JB: Did you see the shiny shirt? LMAO!!
5. Udoka: You see that lady back there in the orange...that's my mama...and she'll take care of anything that I need.
6. Are they singing showtunes?
7. JM: Did this just turn into a party at Brick City during Step Show weekend?
8. NW: If I don't see our pictures up on the screen, it might get ugly!
9. I bet you all the money that I don't have that those are NOT law students.
10. Did she just say what I think she said...that she was NOT going to give 100%? Ooooh...it's going to be ugly when they don't announce her name and she is the only one running.
11. Was he referring to the founder of our organization when he said that bald gentleman that is sitting on the stage whose name he can't remember?
12. AW: Taste this. Me: This ain't no damn Riesling. Somebody find Dolop. LOL!
13: Does he have on a double-breasted suit? That is soooo Facebookable.
14. Delegate: Actually, Mr. AG, it's supposed to go like this.
15: Me to the security guard at the door: I know you have your whole capacity thing, but my chapter paid for this event. You are going to let me in this door. Security Guard: How do I know that? Me: (looking him dead in the eye) Because I said so! (and then he let me through the door) LOL!
16. Me (after seeing that my school we not listed in the directory): Lord, please calm my nerves...cause I'm on the edge of acting ethnic!!
17. Me to one of my boys on the phone: I think I just saw my 3d wife! I'll call you back. LOL!
18. JP: There were 18 women that got on this bus before one dude did. Damn, damn, damn!
19. JB: Ask only ONE question.
20. TB: I've had enough shots this weekend to last an entire year.
21: T: Just let me know. I've been known to throw a few picks in my time.
22: Random person: Damn...the election is over...and now he den went and got gangsta!
23: Random lady at the next table: And the winner is...(she starts pointing at her eyes).
24: Is Youri dancing? Who would've thunk?
25: Me to several people...and several people to me: Do I know you? Um...I don't think so. Oh, wait, I know you from Facebook. LOL!
26: She must have thought she was going to a strip club and not on a boat cruise.
27: Are those slivers of sequin? LMAO!!
28. Chicken with a white sauce, mashed potatoes and green beans. Same chicken with a green sauce, mashed potatoes, and spinach. Same chicken chopped up and put on pasta with a cream sauce. ... if they serve chicken one more time! LOL!!

...and on and on and on.

Anyways, I know I'm graduating...but best believe I will be in Miami and Atlanta for Conventions 07.

I'm Madder Than a Wolf

OK...I have these clients. I do all that I can to represent them to the utmost. And, what do they do...not show up for fucking court!

I had to get up this morning at 7:00 AM, after having gone to bed at 3 AM, so that I could go to my clinic office and grab everything that I need in court today. Then, I make it to the court ON TIME...9:00 a.m....court doesn't start until 10:15...and my client is a no show. So, I have to get up, stand there looking like boo-boo the fool...and profess that I have no representations about my client's whereabouts.

That shit pisses me off!!

My Name is Addictive...and I'm an Alcoholic!!

OK...last night, I realized that I'm an alcoholic. Of course, I've had this epiphany at least 17 times before...last night being the latest.

So, after step practice (yep, you read right...the kid is out of retirement, for just a little while), we decided to stop at the local watering hole for a drink. Now, mind you, we only planned on spending about 30 minutes there and then leaving. We get there at around 10:30...and said we'd leave by 11:00. Well, 4 bourbon and ginger ales, 1 bourbon and Coke, 2 Tuaca shots, and a basket of chicken fingers later...we finally left. (And, yes, that is the amount of alcohol I drank by myself. Everyone else had 2 more drinks more than me. Lushes, I tell ya...lushes!) Of course, by then it was 12:30. The sad part is that I was only slightly buzzed, and for the most part, really not feeling it. (though, I can't say that for some of the other folk.)

I know... I know... I'm an alcoholic!!

Pet Peeves: The Addendum

More things that get on my fuckin nerves:

1. People who walk up to the Metro turnstile and put their card in knowing DAMN WELL that they don't have any more money left on it.

2. People who are scared to step onto the damn escalator. I mean, does it really take a whole minute for you to get on the escalator. Move out of the damn way!

3. When people who are extra to the extreme over stupid shit.

4. When you tell people that their breath stinks, and they don't immediately move out of your fuckin face...or immediately attempt to fix that shit.

5. People that ask questions that they already 100% know the answer to.

6. Gas stations that don't have pay at the pump! It's freakin 2006...get with the muthafuckin program!


See, my body may be back in DC, but my mind and spirit are still in Mexico...and dumb folks/shit are making it that much harder for me to accept the fact that I'm back to the grind.

French Fries and Lent

Those that know me best know that french fries are by far my favorite food. Not chicken, shrimp, crab, lobster, mac and cheese...nope...none of those have nothing on French fries. So, in an act of faith for Lent, I decide to give up French fries for Lent. 40 whole days and nights without French fries.

Of course, Lent started the Wednesday before I went to Puerto Vallarta...and my friends, specifically LP and PJM who would politely take the fries right off of my plate, have been reminding me of my committment. So, far, I've done well...but I must say that I am struggling. I mean, I eat French fries as an entire meal sometime. Just French Fries. No ketchup. No honey mustard. Just fries.

(sigh)

Until April 16th...

Back to Reality

...OK...I'm sadder den a wolf!

I'm back in DC after almost a week in Puerto Vallarta! With that said, you can understand why I'm sad.

But, I very much enjoyed my time there...and plan on going back soon. And, thanks to the seven ladies that allowed me tag along after my boys decided to not go anywhere for Spring Break. I was like...I don't give damn if I'm the only guy in this group...I'll be damned if I stay my ass in the good old USA for my very last Spring Break. I think not! Thanks. The Management.

Here are some of my favorite, or shall I say, memorable moments:

1. The canopy tour. Yep...you got it...a group of us went swinging through the damn trees! That shit was hella fun!

2. PJ going off on the Maritur lady manager who was trying to steal our money...AND, the young messenger boy who was only trying to crack a joke to ease the tension. LMAO!!

3. Parasailing! YAY!

4. Las Marietas. OK...so on one day we went on this all day whale and dolphin wathing, snorkeling, kayaking tour with an open bar...some 45 minutes out into the ocean. So, I decide to go snorkeling. NOT the best snorkeling experience I've ever had...much better in Cozumel and Cancun. I couldn't see shit! Please, I think I may have screamed once after trying to swim away from a gang of jellyfish! LMAO!! Overall, it was a good day trip!

5. The world is small. So, on our first night, we go to Senor Frogs. And, low and behold, who do we run into...random folks from school. Luckily, it was a group of people that we liked. I was like...I'm a need to not be thousands of miles away from DC and end up in the same bar as the people that I see everyday.

6. One note of advice: Don't be a shiner. (Villa del Palmar will get that one) LOL!

7. I actually know Spanish a little better than I thought. Yes, it's true, I travelled with my little Mexican Spanish guide...but for the most part, I could carry on small conversation.

8. The Shrimp Factory! All I can say is...I'm going back to Puerto Vallarta just to go to the Shrimp Factory! It was YUM!!

9. Villa del Palmar. Our PV home was excellent. Nice room with kitchen. Great view. Nice staff (except for the fact that it took them like 20-30 minutes one day to make us 3 damn omelettes). Great activities. And, great low price. Definitely the place where I will be staying when I go back sometime this year.

10. The people. Overall, the people of PV were extremely nice and welcoming.

11. The margaritas and pico de gallo at Pipi's.

12. The margaritas and pico de gallo at Jalisco and Bar Equipales.

13. The 65 cent bottled water, Ciel, which is a Coca-Cola product.

14. The mezcal and almond margarita I brought home.

15. And, Angels and Demons...the book that I started reading that I plan on finishing shortly. That shit is suspenseful as hell.

16. The PERFECT WEATHER! I was laying out on the beach like I was George Hamilton. Now, I'm dark as hell, and I don't give a damn!

So, that's that. As SoulIISoul says...back to life, back to reality!

World Premiere

I was in a production this weekend...and generally, being in front of crowd speaking or doing whatever is nothing to me. Singing, however, is another story. Though everyone has given me very positive feedback, I was up on stage shaking like Muhammad Ali. Then, right before I'm supposed to sing, my mouth loses every bit of saliva...and then I couldn't swallow...I was a mess! I'm just glad it came out well.

And speaking of performances, why is it that the people with the least talent are the first ones to want to volunteer to do something? Have some rhythm before you decide that you want to volunteer to choreograph a dance! Don't be the person that choreographs the dance...and then get on stage and look worse than everyone else!! Thanks. The Management.

Throwback

OK...this past weekend, I went back to my alma mater. And, I must say, I had a blast! And, I'm also proud to announce that I didn't see anyone that I knew from when I went there...that was still there...and in school. LOL!!

It's funny though how you forget people. There were several people that I saw that I hadn't seen in a long time...some who I hadn't seen since I graduated. These were all people that played different roles in your lives...and yet, as time moves on, they in essence get replaced. I guess the saying is right...people are in your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.

What's even funnier is that...I am usually very good with names. So, I'm standing out of the step show...and I see this girl who I know...and we are reminiscing about old times. We talking about this...and that...then we see someone else that I haven't seen in forever. And, I'm like...what is her name? And, she's like..that's so and so. And, I'm like...ohhh...that's right. Then I proceed to tell my friend how I saw someone at this happy hour event...and talked to the girl for at least 15 minutes...and knew her...but couldn't for the life of me remember her name. Then we both start laughing....and what about my friend pulls my card...and she's like...so what's my name. And, I say very matter-of-factly...Tasha! WOMP! WOMP! WOMP! Wrong Answer! Thanks. The Management! LOL LMAO! And, she is like...no...but close...it's Tonya! Um....yeah...who was looking like Boo Boo the Fool? (me jumping up and down) Me me me me!! LOL!

And, then...on top of that...at least 4 people came up to me...1 who I had never met in my life...to tell me how I was their mentor in college! And, I'm like...thanks for saying that...but now I feel older than a wolf! It was definitely flattering, though, to be appreciated!

I also went home this weekend for my city's annual African American Heritage Festival. It is like Black Homecoming in my hometown...lots of people come back just for the festival. It is always good to go home and see the people that helped to raise you. I can attest to the fact that I was indeed raised by a village...and my hometown was definitely my village. Be that as it may, coming home also makes me realize that I truly did grow up in small town America. You gotta love small towns and the folks that live there! My fellow Eustonians crack me the hell up! So many comments...too many to count . Plus, I had some shrimp at the festival that made me want to slap the cook AND my mama!! I don't know what it was they seasoned with...but they put not only their big toe...but their entire foot in those shrimp!! In fact, I want to go and find those people and tell them to fire up the fryer/grill wherever they have to and fix me some shrimp b/c I could've eaten those shrimp until I literally got sick.

Being from a small town, but now living in a large city...it's funny when you come back and see small town folk (and yes I can rightfully say small town folk...b/c though I'm from small town, my parents have always told me that I'm a city boy who just happened to be raised in a small town...lol). Like the girl who thought that it was cute to get her hair colored red and blonde...walking around looking like a damn rooster. NOT CUTE. Or the guy who was walking around in this black velour jumpsuit when it was 77 degrees out. NOT CUTE and HOT AS HELL! Or the guy who I swore had a damn Jheri curl. HELL TO THE NAW. Or the big girl who was wearing a spandex type turquoise blue jumpsuit (hold on...just had a recurring mental picture and once again threw up in my mouth!). SOOO NOT CUTE...and in fact, an ABOMINATION! Or the various bright ass colored wigs that I saw. Or the man that had perm. Or one of my old friends who is now a proclaimed preacher...yet has a grill that's blinging more than most. LOL...you GOTTA LOVE THAT!! Or the countless gold teeth that I saw...I could go on and on...but I wouldn't trade it from the world b/c home is home...and definitely where the heart is! LMAO!!

Anyways, a great weekend I had indeed!!

Reflections on Coretta

I am still truly overwhelmed by the passing of Coretta Scott King. The more I think about it, the sadder I become.

She was indeed a phenomenal woman! She was married to a man with a mission...and nearly 40 years after his death, she made it her mission to ensure that his dream would never be forgotten. And, we have not forgotten!

I can only hope that Mrs. King, and those millions of other dreamers on whose shoulders I stand, are looking down on me...and are proud of the accomplishments that their courage has allowed me to make in my life.

May God bless her soul!

Pet Peeves

1. Bad ass kids. And, in particular, loud ass bad ass kids that ride the metro. Sit your non bill-paying ass down and shut the hell up!

2. Uncleanliness. I realize that I may just be borderline OCD...but damn, if you cook something, clean your fuckin dishes. Don't leave notes talking about...I'll get that tomorrow after work. Hell to the naw...you need to clean that shit now.

3. Liars. OK...I get a call from a friend this weekend talking about, yeah...your boy told me that you told him all about me. I'm like, who are you talking about? She says, X. I don't even talk to X like that. In fact, X gets on my fuckin nerves b/c he is always trying to get attention, he is height deficient and his breath stinks. Luckily, she knew how X is and she didn't believe him anyways. But, don't be lying on me....asshole!

4. People that don't speak. Maybe it's b/c I'm from the South...but I just expect that when you speak to people, they will speak back. I mean, is it going to give you a heart attack to speak back to someone who speaks to you. Cold bastards!!

5. People who don't read...and then try to make jokes when their ass gets called on. I'm not saying that I'm a gunner or anything (refer to Pia's World for definition of gunner), but best believe, if I know that I haven't read, I'm not going to class...or I'm going to tell the professor beforehand so that he/she won't call on me. That way, I don't look like an idiot when I am called on and clearly not prepared. And, then if you are not prepared and do get called on, that would not be the time to try to be Adam Sandler. You may just want to apologize for not being prepared and then shut the fuck up! Thanks. The Management.

6. Black belts and brown shoes; or vice versa!

...this will be an ongoing post.

Why?

...an addendum to my Understanding the Rules of Metro post.

Why do people choose to sit right by you when there are clearly several empty rows of seats on the same train? I mean, don't you want your space b/c I damn sure want mine. This morning, I'm sitting in a row all by myself, minding my own damn business, reading the Express. And, lo and behold, this lady decides to plop herself down right next to me. At first, I was not annoyed...but as I looked up and realized that there were NUMEROUS empty ROWS of seats that she could have sat in...I immediately became irritated...and then I had to give her the "Bitch, I KNOW you see all of those empty rows on this train" look. And, then what made it worse is that she proceeded to start blowing her freakin nose very loudly. Now, I'm pissed! Now only are you all up on me...but now you are blowing your freakin germs all over me. Nasty bitch!

Of course, I could have just gotten up and moved myself...but I was CLEARLY sitting in my seat FIRST!! Luckily, she got off at the next stop, and then I had the seat all to myself until I got to my stop...but as you can tell, I'm still irritated.

Understanding the Rules of Metro

OK...one of my largest pet peeves centers around people that don't know the rules of riding the Metro. And, I'm not talking about the thousands of tourists that ride our wonderful Metro system everyday...it's the regular Metro riders that irk my nerve...those that ride very often, if not everyday, and still don't know the flow.

So, for all the Metro riders out there reading this...observe the rules of Metro.

1. First of all, the escalators have two sides: the right side for the riders and the left side for the walkers...that's right, Metro escalators have a "passing lane." As such, if you plan on riding the escalator all the way up or down, move your ass over to the right side.

2. As you are approaching your stop, don't wait until the train stops to proceed to the door. Get up and attempt to move toward your door so that you can get off as swiftly as possible. The longer you take to get off, the longer it takes for people to board.

3. Have your fare cards out and in your hands BEFORE you get to the turnstile. What I cannot stand more than anything is waiting behind someone who standing at the turnstile and digging in their coats, purses, wallets...trying to find their farecards...while blocking the damn turnstile lane. Shame on you!

4. If it is rush hour, move all the way to the middle of the car once boarding the train. If you are at Metro Center at 5:30, you canNOT be the first person on the train, and then you have the right to just stop and perch at the door...while 300 other people are trying to get in that same door. Move all the way in, asshole!!

5. If you ride the metro everyday, get a SMARTCARD!! Why regular metro riders don't take the time to purchase a $5 Smartcard is beyond me.

6. If you are a child, act as a child. Sit on the metro and BE QUIET! The second most annoying thing about being on the metro is loud ass school kids. Shut the hell up!! There is not that much going on in elementary and middle school that you have to talk so much...and talk so loud!! Children just don't have proper home training these days!

7. Guess what? Another train is coming. So, don't kill yourself by breaking the door open to get on a train. I promise you (unless it's close to midnight during the week, or 3 on the weekends) another train is coming.

Those are the rules....adhere to them!

Thanks.

The Management.

Flavor of Love

One word for this show: SHENANIGANS!!

Or as my homie PJM puts it....DARKNESS!!

I have soooo many comments about this show...and these people...

1) Are these hoes...and yes, they are hoes...serious? Did they not SEE who they are trying to win as a price. That nukka looks like...um, I cannot even come up with the words to describe...maybe a cross between Shabba Ranks and a chargrilled wombat...or something like that...and he looks like he stinks.

2) And, this Hottie girl...someone CLEARLY lied to you b/c you are in no way hot! The only HOT that you are is a HOT ass mess!!

3) And, did this heifer just tongue Flav down? (gagging) I think I just threw up in my mouth.

4) And, why does Red Oyster have that big ass tattoo on her chest? And, why in the hell is her name Red Oyster?

5) Are they fuckin cryin over Flavor FLAV! Get the fuck outta here.

I am soooo done!

I'm an Addict

Yep...that's right...I'm an addict. I am finally out of the stage of denial...and now I can accept my addiction. Only through acceptance can I finally overcome it.

And, what is my addiction...

Well, it's not crack...b/c crack is wack! But, one may argue that it is a form of crack...internet crack...called Facebook!

That's right...I'm addicted to Facebook...to the point where it is something like this. I wake up in the morning, turn on my computer, check me email...and FACEBOOK. I put my computer on standby...pack it up...get ready for school...go to the Metro...get to school...go to class...check my email and FACEBOOK. I leave that class...go to the lounge...chat for a few...go to the next class...check my email and FACEBOOK. Then, I am done with class...head to the library (actually, THAT is a bold face lie...I haven't seen the inside of the library since last year)...do some work...go to some meetings...chat with my students...go home...check my email and FACEBOOK! Then I manage to leave my computer on...with my email and Facebook logged on just in case there is an update that I need to check out (especially the commentary associated with one particular picture...LMAO). And, best believe, before I close my eyes for the evening, I check my email and FACEBOOK one last time to make sure I didn't miss anything.

I live a sad, sad life!! And, it's all the fault of JC, AL, MR, DA, TS, PJM, JP, JB, KB, SS, RF, PC, SC, JR...yep, it is b/c of all of you and your comments that I addicted. What kind of friends are you to contribute to my addiction? Sad, sad, sad!

On a random note, I finally secured employment for next year...and I must say I am truly blessed!!

Anyways, back to checking Facebook updates...I have to figure out some way to wean myself off of it...but at this point, I don't see that happening in the near future.

OK...and why am I also addicted to the Boondocks...and Desperate Housewives (yep...I'm ashamed to admit it, but my friend made me watch the first episode of this second season b/c she said it was a good show...and though I was adamantly opposed to it...she was actually right...and now my lame ass makes sure that I am in front of a TV every Sunday evening). Pathetic, I tell ya!

Yep...that's right..I'm an addict!

We Were Robbed

First I must say...WE WERE ROBBED!! Yep...that's right...GWBLSA was robbed...and there is a conspiracy in the ranks!

There's no way in the world that my chapter was not the chapter of the year! I REFUSE to believe, or accept it! But, that's OK...I realize that politics is politics. Best believe, though, that I can play that game too...and do believe that come March, the phoenix shall rise. But, it's just business, nothing personal. I love e'rybody!! (ok...not e'rybody...but you get the point, it's just a game).

Now, this weekend I attended the MABLSA Conference. I can honestly say that I thoroughly enjoyed myself. With the exception of the tyrant moot court judges, whom I found to be hysterical (yes, I was really laughing in the inside b/c though they were all cool people outside of the courtroom, when they were "playing their role" I sometimes felt like they needed a hobby); the food at the hotel; the Crowne Plaza (that lacked any kind of grand entrance...call me bourgie, I don't care, but can I get a grand staircase or a big crystal chandelier or something? Thanks. The Management.); the fact that stuff in Philly closes at 2 (clearly NOT a real city); ang going back to the Crowne Plaza, the fact that they were trying to keep my car hostage; the fact that it costs $29 a day to park; the fact that the Sprite at Tragos was flat (that one's for you, Pia); the fact that the stupid boat operators would not let my two members on the boat even though the boat was still tied to the fuckin pier....ok, so I have a lot of exceptions, but I truly did enjoy my weekend...and I can attribture the most of that to the GW contingency that represented at the conference. Our mock trial team finished third overall, the moot court team 4th. But, GW had me cracking up from the second we got to Philly. Classic lines of the weekend:

1) D (to the waitress at Friday's after ordering and receiving her amaretto sour...with a straight face): Excuse me, miss...I don't want this drink anymore...I'm a recovering alcoholic...it was a moment of weakness!! ROTFLMAO!!

2) K (to B): You shole is hungry!!

3) Let the record reflect...this witness is LYING!!

4) K (after the banquest speaker says that she doesn't know about unconditional love): She don't know Jesus!!

5) D (after doing our drive-by historical tour this morning...while driving home and seeing an old wooden house from the highway): And, I bet that's where Sojourner Truth was born! (this particular comment almost made me get into a traffic accident b/c I could not breathe from laughing so hard)

6) J (talking about B after their first round): I truly believed that she was possessed.

7) Me (at Fridays): Ain't nothing wrong with random bouts of bulimia.

8) D (at Fridays...and again with a straight face): I read that it was good for you to, every once
in a while, pick up and eat food that you have dropped on the ground b/c it helps to build up your immune system. LOL!!

9) B (to the waitress at Fridays after eating all of the chicken on her salad): Excuse me, I really am displeased with this salad. It is way too spicy. Could you take this back and get me something else? I've only eaten the breadstick on this plate!!
Um...B, I'm a need you to realize that you have eaten all the chicken and half the salad...talkin bout you only ate the breadsticks. Let the record reflect that she is LYING!! LOL

10) The 100 year old bartender at the hotel: Excuse me, where did they say the after party was going to be? And, what are the drink specials? LMAO!! Um...first of all, who invited you? And, second, you are 320 years old...I'm a need you to take your Andy Rooney looking self, put on your slippers, and go to bed. Thanks. The Management.

I tell ya....yo...I haven't laughed as hard as I did this weekend in a long time. And, I had a great time...can't wait until nationals.

I'm Over it Already

OK...so school started again today...the beginning of the end of my law school career. Or, as my mom puts it, the beginning of the beginning of the rest of my life.

Anyways, today I had Admin Law. OVER IT!! I mean, first of all, I haven't even purchased the book yet. And, then, though I truly appreciate the Socratic method as it forces me to be prepared for class on a daily basis, I don't expect the Socratic method to be used on day one. Why, you ask? First of all, many people are just "testing" out the class and deciding whether they will remain enrolled or not...so it is very likely that they will not have purchased the book. Next, some people just have not had a chance to purchase the book yet. So, don't start cold calling people on day one! Ask for freakin volunteers!! Had he called me today, he would have gotten one big WOMP WOMP WOMP...pump your brakes...I don't have the book yet. Thanks. The Management.

And...why hasn't my financial aid arrived yet. I mean, they SAY that it was mailed on 12/30...by 2 day express. So, I mean...shouldn't it have posted to my account by now? Someone has my money...and I am going to have to go Inspector Gadget on their ass!!

Texas BITCHES!!!

Now...I must admit, normally I don't like anything from Texas except for Beyonce and UGK (ok..plus the rest of Destiny's Child, Mike Jones, Paul Wall, Chamillionaire, chopped and screwed...yada yada yada). But, other than that, I don't like Texas!

Last night, however, I was on the Texas bandwagon b/c I am sooo sick of hearing about USC. Fuck USC!! I mean, if you have 2 Heisman trophy winners on one team, you are SUPPOSED to be good...so stop damn talking about it.

All I have to say is that Vince Young showed both of those Heisman trophy winners that HE is the man! That kid showed the hell out! Over 460 yards...with 200 of them rushing...a QB rushing for 200 yards! And, let's not mention his 3 rushing TDs. Reggie who? Last night, Mr. Bush was quiet...LenDale White was doing all the work. But, even he couldn't match Vince Young who was outstanding!! Or, as SI.com put it, he was In-VINCE-ible. lol

So hats off to Texas for winning the national championship!

And, hats off to the best conference in college football...the SEC...for having 5 teams in the top 15 in the final rankings!! (you know I had to throw that in...GO GATORS!!) lol